![]() ![]() ![]() How do we do that? CREATE DEMAND FOR THIS STYLE. And we need Bill to find a new home too, so he can continue to be The King of Mild™. BUT, he doesn’t put his version in kegs and cans, so we have that going for us! And for you! And since we last brewed this version, it seems that Dark Mild’s are still gaining traction, and we need to keep this three hundred year trend going. Except, maybe, Bill’s version of this beer…which will always be better. This beer has body, it has balance, it has deep flavor, and it’s super low in alcohol. That’s right, it’s English Dark Mild time, and our homage to Bill Arnott and Machine House Brewing. CB: SEVEN DOLLARS?! WHAT A STEAL! We can’t wait to tell our family all about it via our consumer cellular flip phone when they get back from their American Cruise Line Mississippi River adventure!ĭark Mild | 3.6% | 25 IBU It’s time to revisit this classic. That said, a pint of something like this would typically go for $7 dollars in today’s market. Why are they even named the same?! JC: You got me on that one! Ok, so as far as an estimate goes, as an heirloom recipe, we know it’s priceless to you, and putting a dollar amount on something like this doesn’t really capture the intrinsic value. Where did it get this orange-hued color from? CB: Oh, so we used a little bit of Crystal malt in the recipe as well, which according to our research, has no relation to the Crystal hops also used. And so what did you do with them? CB: We put them in this beer! JC: NO! CB: YES. But yes, you are in fact correct, these are hop varieties, none of which we developed after the year 198X. It sounded like a line of cleaning products! JC: How comical. What a spectacle, that must’ve been a gas! So, what names were on these boxes? CB: Centennial, Chinook, Crystal, and Cascade. These things were relics, and all started with the letter “C” which is weird because there’s 26 letters to choose from… JC: Right. ![]() Cloudburst: Well, we were rummaging through our cooler one afternoon while brewing a pale ale and came across some boxes marked with what appeared to be names of hops? But like, not the hops people use today. What a trip! Anyways, please enjoy this IPA with Motueka, Mosaic, Citra.Īmerican Pale Ale | 5.5% | 50 IBU □da da duh da, da da duh da, do doodly do □ James Callahan: Ok so tell us what you have here. Freestyle Hop Farms hired the sibling of the world famous Geico Insurance gecko to do its field marketing. Just as they were about to paddle away, they turned around and yelled “Did you know, brewing with Motueka hops from Freestyle Farms could save you up to 15% on your hop bill?” UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE. I took the cone and placed it in my shirt pocket, and without any words exchanged, the gecko began to walk back to their kayak. I rubbed my eyes to confirm and began to self-check my consciousness - Maybe I’m dehydrated? Maybe I ate too many mushrooms? - but by the time I snapped out of it, the gecko was standing in front of me, making intense eye contact, with their palm extended and a single hop cone resting upon it. As it neared, I shit you not, it appeared to have a human-sized gecko at the helm. IPA | 6.4% | 52 IBU Whilst walking the beach on the mouth of the Motueka River near the Western shore of Tasman Bay, a kayak approached. So, this beer - we decided to give Vista hops (the newest public hop variety from the USDA) another shot and paired it with two Yakima classics - Citra & Simcoe - which resulted in notes of satsuma, white grapefruit, pine needles and “if it hurts you then I’m sorry please don’t think that this was easssyyyyyyyyy.” This beer’s name is because it was brew number 1,111 - aka eleven eleven - which happens to be an early 00s emo lyric from an exceptionally cringey/whiney song that teenage Steve may or may not have used to sing at full volume while driving solo in his car. Like, I’m sure you were thinking we were gonna take this in a dark direction with the current state of affairs - like how House Committees are being taken over by right wing extremists, or how Florida is turning into Gilead right before our eyes, or how thoughts and prayers still don’t seem to be a panacea for police and gun reform - and how it’s hard to sleep right now, let alone dream, and have good dreams at that! Nope. IPA | 6.5% | 55 IBU This beer name is not what it seems. ![]()
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